Photo credit:Destination Wedding in Cambodia Mark J. Sebastian | www.markjsebastian.com
This is a Guest Post by Mr. Livina Tep, a Cambodian owner of www.teplivina.com
Earlier this month, there was a hot Facebook discussion amongst Cambodian people about a couple blog posts about Cambodia and Cambodian people written by a tourist coming to Cambodia.
The posts stirred up the discussion in such a negative way.
As a Cambodian, I felt painful reading the article even though most of what the author (called Mark) wrote about his experience in the article is true at least in my experience and knowledge about the country and culture.
However, after reading many articles in the website, I came up with an idea that we Cambodians probably should learn to treat foreigners or tourists better so that such a bad article about Cambodia is not published whether domestically or internationally.
There should not be more articles like this shown to the world. Instead, Cambodia or Cambodian people should be written or talked about in a much better way.
In fact, to have good-minded tourists recommend Cambodia to other tourists is not something that comes automatically without any action or reason.
The tourists who come to visit Cambodia for fun or work have to have a good experience with the country in order for them to make genuine recommendation to their friends, relatives and other people.
As the hosts of the country, we Cambodians should do something if we want more tourists and foreign investors or workers to come to our country.
We have to do something to gain more popularity and reputation for Cambodia so that more and more foreigners bring more money to us directly or indirectly.
In my opinion, on behalf of the service providers, we should learn to satisfy our customers better.
In this article, I am going to offer some ideas on how Cambodian people should treat foreigners or visitors who come to Cambodia.
1. Treat visitors with fairness
All in all, foreigners are also human beings even though they come from different areas of the world. They are, physically, far away from home.
They really want to feel at home.
The faster they merge with Cambodian people and culture, the better for them. One of the best ways to make them feel belonged to the country is to treat them fairly.
Cambodians should do to foreigners the same way as they do to other Cambodian people.
Let me give you a real scenario that I witnessed and that I think should never happen to any foreigners coming to Cambodia.
A couple days ago, I had lunch in a local restaurant near The Central Market, Phnom Penh. While having lunch, I had a travelling shoe-polisher approached and got my shoes shined.
After getting my shoes, he immediately went to have another pair of shoes belonging to a male foreigner having fried rice at a nearby table.
He charged me around $0.40USD, which is a reasonable price for a normal shoeshine.
Yet, what was surprising to me is that he charged or forced the Khmer-language-illiterate foreigner to pay him $3USD.
With hesitation and doubts, the foreigner paid anyway, maybe because he did not want to ask from help from the seller or cause more problems.
I am sure the foreigner was extremely upset because he knew that he was ripped off since 3 dollars for a 5-minute street shoeshine is way too expensive.
I felt bad for him because I myself used to be ripped off by taxi-drivers in Ho Chi Minh and Bangkok.
I am sure that he would never ever recommend his friends to have shoeshine in Cambodia, if not travel in Cambodia because I did the same thing with my experience.
Whenever I hear people wanting to travel to the cities where I was over-charged, I always advise them to be extra-careful with those taxis or even not to go to the cities if they can choose.
The example mentioned is just one of the many cases that I have seen foreigners ripped off in Cambodia.
But, I still have a strong hope that we Cambodians can stop doing such a stupid thing because it is only a short-term gain.
Long-term benefits are more sustainable for the development of the country.
2. Treat visitors with genuineness and kindness
Foreigners also hate to be cheated. Cheating should not exist in Cambodia, a country generally known to have a long history and beautifully gentle culture.
Unfortunately, cheating really exists in this country and is done my some evil-minded individuals who think of nothing but their benefits.
Genuine treatment leads to confidence and trust, which definitely leads to positive recommendation.
As I wrote above, foreigners want to feel the sense of belonging.
If you happen to have any chance to help them, you should do it with a god-like heart, not just because you want their money. You must show them that they are in good hands.
If possible, you should treat them like they are your friends.
We all want money especially from visitors who are happy to spend money in our country, but money should not be the only motivation for us to work with or for these foreigners. Humanity works best with these people.
We Cambodians should learn to help them without thinking of money or any benefits at all, at least before we accomplish our work.
To set a good example, I personally like to help foreigners who get lost finding ways. Seeing them looking for where to go, I approach them and give directions FREE of Charge.
I am happy to do it because I can practice using English language, and those foreigners feel even happier because they can get to the place they want to.
It is a win-win strategy.
3. Treat visitors with knowledge
Because they are not in our country, foreigners do not know much about our country and culture at all.
Even though most, if not all, of them want to know and learn about us, they in general are so critical in our information.
In order words, they do not want fake or wrong information about anything starting for toilet paper to the history of Angkor.
If you work with foreigners, you should impress them with your knowledge. You do not give them any information just for the sake of giving.
Instead, you should filter your information and give them something reliable. This way builds a positive image for our people.
Again, treat them like your friends or relatives, and I am sure you don’t want to give wrong information to your friends or relatives.
Let me give you another example why I think knowledge is important.
Whenever I go to Siem Reap, the Cambodian province of Angkor Wat, I am not happy at all to see small children between 12 and 16 years old working as unofficial tour-guides for some little money.
I clearly understand that the kids are financially desperate, thus forcing them to learn stories and facts of some temples so that they can earn by telling those to tourists.
Yet, I am not joyful with this because the kids with unreliable or pre-matured knowledge could cause problems or upset the tourists especially when they realize at the end that they have always carried the wrong information got from the kids or other Cambodian adults.
Again, this is about long-term benefits. Righteousness brings certainty and confidence while unreliability brings confusion and rejection. Lack of knowledge could make foreigners look down on us while fake information makes foreigners feel cheated.
4. Treat visitors with security
One of the best ways that Cambodians could give to foreign visitors is security, and one of the worst things that Cambodians could do to any foreigners is stealing things from them or physically attacking them for any reasons.
Shamelessly, I have to admit that such things have been reported to have happened to foreigners in Cambodia.
Specifically for stealing, it is not even a good act for Cambodians to do for other Cambodians, let alone Foreigners.
Yet, there are people who really need money to survive, thus forcing them to take upon such an immoral act.
As for physical attack, I am not saying that all foreigners coming to Cambodia are good, thus deserving respect from us.
Some of them especially males are quite bad because they come to Cambodia with ugly purposes like doing drugs, buying sex, abusing women or children, and etc.
However, we Cambodians should deal with this type of foreigners or tourists lawfully rather than physically. A lot of people make judgment based on overgeneralization, thus making our reasons non-sense if we attack these foreigners because we automatically become racists when we assault them no matter how bad a mistake they have made.
Furthermore, I urge our Cambodian people to take good care of foreigners coming to our country by helping them honestly and genuinely if you witness that they are in trouble or something.
We should protect them from the few bad Cambodian people who are waiting to take benefits from foreigners, thus destroying the whole image of Cambodia.
If we provide them with security and warmth, they will surely come to our country again and possibly with more friends and relatives.
5. Treat visitors with righteousness
This point aims to awaken Cambodian people from giving too high value to foreigners or visitors to Cambodia.
While I am writing this, there are still many Cambodian people who worship foreigners especially those from America, European countries, or the 1st-world countries as if they were gods.
Even though we should not de-value them, we should not give them too high value either.
Seeing these foreigners with too high a value, many Cambodian people are willing to sacrifice anything to be near them.
This is how many Cambodian women and children have been tricked and cheated by these so-called great foreigners.
We Cambodians should stop carrying such a disastrous belief which makes these foreign visitors too proud of themselves that they can do anything in Cambodia as long as they have money.
I strongly believe that if we give value to ourselves, they will see our value and stop causing problems to us.
Plus, if we give value to ourselves, we will stop thinking of messing around with them because we know that they are nothing but human beings like us.
In short, since most of us Cambodians are Buddhists, we should follow Buddha’s advice that goes “Do upon others as you like to be done upon”.
I personally have travelled to many countries and know that as a tourist, I really want to have the feeling of staying at home with me even though I am abroad.
I want to have fun in the country that I visit, make new friends who are also genuinely interested in me and who can take good care of me, and arrive home safely.
I hope that we Cambodians can give all visitors to our country such a pleasant experience so that we will come to our country again for fun or work and bring more and more people with them.
If we can do that, our country will get more income leading to development and prosperity.
The article is written by Mr. Livina Tep, a Cambodian owner of www.teplivina.com. He has written many article related to Self Development and learning, students and people in Cambodia and other countries to grow and develop exponentially.
Mark says
Hello Mr. Tep Lavina,
Let me start by expressing gratitude for linking my post
and even more for commenting on my blog. This post actually explains a lot
cause I was wondering why would an article I wrote some 2 years ago start
getting so much attention all of a sudden.
Secondly, I would like to express gratitude for all of
you who commented on my blog and despite harsh criticism of the article,
remained very civil. I did get called names many times and got a few death
threats sent to me via my blog’s contact form, but by retaining high level of
civility, people from Cambodia who posted comments showed how far many of you
got despite challenges your country faces.
Now to the point - I sincerely wish you all the best of
luck in your upcoming journey. It’s gonna be a bumpy road, but there are
rewards beyond it. You must understand that it is your country and your
society. No one but you yourself will be responsible for what it will become.
It can become a great and prosperous country, or can remain a bitchland ridden
with poverty. You hold the reins, the direction in which the sled will turn
will depend on which way you will pull.
That being said, I can offer some food for thought from
the time when I was in your country:
I spent 5 months riding around on a bicycle. It happened
to me many a time that a motorcycle was passing me and a passenger would throw
plastic bag used to hold a beverage into the ditch, narrowly missing my head.
After I’ve seen that happen several times, I started asking myself - why are
you Cambodians polluting your own backyard?
Everywhere I looked, there was garbage. Each body of
water I saw was so filthy, it hurt my eyes to even look at it, let alone
entertain an idea of possibly dipping in. When in a bus, locals were buying
food from vendors selling snacks. After finishing food, the wrapped went out of
the window. Same with everything else - buying coconut water or sugar cane juice
which they took in a plastic cup results
in said plastic cup being dished into the environment.
I was only a visitor to your country. From my perspective
- I could have acted the same way locals did and just dispose of all my garbage
by dropping it on the green because I knew that I wasn’t gonna live in this
garbage forever. One day I would leave, setting myself free from being
surrounded with trash, yet still… I didn’t litter. But for you - it’s your
own country. This is where you live. You throw garbage in your backyard, it
will stay in your backyard because this is your home. If a foreigner who is
bound to leave doesn’t litter, then why do you so vigorously pollute the very
place where you live?
It’s your country, your society. If you turn it into a
pile of garbage, garbage is what you will live in. People from the village
where I volunteered spent generations bathing in the nearby lake, pissing and
shitting into it, washing their laundry in it with non biodegradable detergents
and using it as a general dump site. The lake looks and smells like shit
already. Any life that may have been in it has long died. Yet the lake is still
being abused in the same way. The buffer which will trigger irreversible consequences
is fast approaching and once crossed, there will be no turning back.
I spent 5 months desperately trying to make the villagers
change their behavior and save the lake their lives depend on before it’s too
late. 5 months - and nobody gave a single crap. Everybody just shook their head
as if in agreement with what I was trying to accomplish but at the end of the
day, they all came to the same lake and spent another day of their life polluting
it.
Trying to change people’s life by teaching them the
tricks I use to generate money online was just as big a failure. Everybody was
interested in making good money, but nobody was interested in doing anything to
earn it.
I spent many hours taking them to the internet cafes,
running down my vocal cords while none showed any interest in learning anything.
I paid for the internet time, so they used it in chatrooms blabbering with
their friends, mostly among themselves sitting next to each other. Just being
on the internet instead of talking face to face made it cooler for them so that’s
all they did.
Zero interest to achieve any change with their own
devices. And that’s what I think is wrong with Cambodia. If you continue
following the same approach, little will change. Wanting more money doesn’t
mean having it. My villagers all wanted change, they all wanted more money and brighter
future, but it all stayed in the wanting. When it came to actually taking steps
towards achieving change, things stood still and I was laughed at for making an
arse of myself trying to teach them something.
It was truly discouraging spending money to bring them to
the internet cafes then trying to make them listen to me so I can show them a
thing or two, while they would all laugh at me because none of them was paying
any attention and to them it meant that I made myself look like an ass. Kind of
like: “Look at this fool trying to make us listen to him and we’re all
ignoring him. What an idiot!”
Many foreigners come to your country because air traffic
became less expensive in the past few years and people are getting excited
about previously less open countries opening up to tourism. Most of these
foreigners come as part of organized tours. They come, they have tour guides
take them to pre determined places and then they leave.
Some foreigners who visit your country, however, like me
are backpackers. We do not take organized tours and typically spend more time
in a country we visit. If I meet any foreigners while I’m visiting other countries,
it’s those backpackers. And trust me, while I was in Cambodia, there was quite
a lot of discontent. I remember vividly the line by an Australian woman in her
40’s who bought a 3 day pass for Angkor but left after day 1 stating:
“Tell them they can take their f**king temple and shove it up their
arse!”
A few months before coming to Cambodia, I spent some time
in Iceland. Iceland just went bankrupt a few months prior. The whole economy of
the country just collapsed. I visited that country and despite difficult times
faced before them, Icelanders treated me with utmost respect and open heart.
I went half way across the world, but have never had an
encounter with population that would be so willing to go out of their way to
help a stranger as they do in Iceland. In many cases it must have incurred
direct financial cost to parties involved yet there never was a second of
hesitation.
When I went to Skaftafell National Park, for example, I
needed to get on the internet urgently so I went to the information office
where they had computers they were renting out on a 30 minutes basis. The way
they had it set up was that after you’d paid, the cashier rang it into the
register and it printed a receipt with a unique code you could use to log in.
It would kick you out after 30 minutes.
Because it was in a remote, isolated location, it wasn’t
particularly cheap so I only bought 30 minutes of online time and tried my best
to type really quickly to get an important request posted. But minutes were
passing by and I was just about done typing at a 29 minutes mark. Then with the
time it took to copy the text and load it into a website where I needed it
posted, by the time I hit SUBMIT, my time was out and the computer started
resetting before the sumbit could have gone through.
I literally lost 30 minutes realizing that all that time
I spent typing was lost because none of what I typed would have stayed in the
clipboard so I’d have to type everything again from the beginning. So I went to
the cashier girl to tell her that I was frustrated because I just paid for
previous 30 minutes and didn’t even get done what I needed.
What happened next surprised me. The girl rang through
the cash registered and printed me a new receipt bearing a new amount paid with
a new code and gave it to me so I can get done what I didn’t get done before. I
did not understand what just happened. No cashier in the world would take the
cost of a customer massing up because of his own incompetence upon herself but
that’s not how they do it in Iceland. In Iceland, when they see a person in
distress, they help regardless of cost. They see you need help, so help is what
they give you.
I had a problem with my cell phone. I bought a SIM card
but it only worked in Reykjavik. So I went to that random phone shop at the
opposite end of the country to ask if they knew what was going on. The woman,
instantly upon explaining that I bought this SIM card and it worked in
Reykjavik but after leaving the city limits it constantly tells me that there
is no signal, she opened a brand new SIM card to try if it would work and was
willing to give me that new one just so a random stranger - ME is not left
having spent money for a SIM card that doesn’t work for him. Seriously, she had
that SIM card in her inventory to sell, but she saw a person with a problem and
took the cost to help him. A businessman running a business, instead of taking
advantage of a foreigner, incurred the expense to help a man she was bound to
never see again.
Unfortunately for me, after she was done helping me, I
left her store but forgot my phone’s charger in her outlet. I didn’t realize
this was the case until I was done circumventing the island and had a plane to
catch. There was simply no way for me to drive for 18 hours to a town where I
forgot it to retrieve my damn charger. So I flew back to Canada and emailed a
girl whom I met in that part of the country. I asked her if she would be
willing to go to the shop I described and speak with the lady who would surely
remember that confused foreigner whom she unconditionally helped.
That girl went to the shop, recovered my charger and paid
for shipping back to Canada insisting on nothing in return. What do you think
I’ll be telling people each time they ask me about Iceland? What do you think
I’ll tell them if they ask me which was my favorite country after being half
way across the world? I was a stranger and a person they were never gonna see
again, yet they never hesitated for one second to help, even if it meant direct
financial loss for them.
Before Iceland, I visited Cuba. People in Cuba are much,
much poorer than you are in Cambodia. On a few occasions, they also came off
aggressive. I rented a car and someone would wave me down as if to warn me of
incoming danger, but it was only to offer me a room for rent or advice me of a
restaurant that their family owned, etc. Yet despite poverty, there has never
been anything to make a tourist feel uncomfortable. I could walk alone down an
unlit back alley and there wouldn’t even be any inappropriate noises made, let
alone any moves to imply potential danger.
Back to Cambodia - the subjects of Tuk Tuk drivers is a
popular one. The most common response of my criticism of them is that they are
just fathers trying to earn money to provide for their families. This excuse is
used to justify their aggressive behavior towards tourists whose business
they’re “trying to earn”. Without trying to be the devil’s advocate,
I can honestly tell you that no matter where in the world you look, there is no
business model that would thrive on aggression against potential customers.
There were many - and I mean MANY - instances when I was
gonna take a ride in a Tuk Tuk, but because they were aggressive, I told to
myself: “Screw you all, I’ll walk instead! No matter how far.” And
I’m not the only one. Do you really think that if Tuk Tuk drivers stopped being
obnoxious and bothersome, that it would negatively affect their income? Applying
pressure tactics is a great way to discourage people from ever considering their
services. You try walking down a street and have someone jump you every 30
seconds so you can’t finish a single sentence and then tell me if you’d
consider paying them for their service.
Another big problem Cambodia is plagued with are fake
NGOs. I may be the only one criticising Tuk Tuk drivers, but when it comes to
NGOs, you’ll find many articles on the internet written by foreigners who were
scammed. This again is definitely not moving your country in the right
direction and will only hurt in the long run. There are hundreds of people who
were used and abused by fake NGOs and there’s often large amounts of money they
are scammed out of so they’re not gonna keep to themselves.
Anyway - my comment is getting way too long so I’m gonna
stop. Thank you again for linking to my blog and commenting. I had some harsh
things to say about Cambodia however the response I received from you and from
many other people who commented on my blog pictured you in a whole different
light. This is also something people will see. You have a hard and windy road
ahead yourself, but I hope you persevere and become a successful and prosperous
nation.
Best of luck,
Mark
Livinatep says
Mark, yours is the longest comment I have ever read. Again, I admire you for being honest and critical in your comments and thoughts. A lot of Cambodians who read your articles without thinking may be mad at you for writing them, but I don’t. I personally see them as something to learn from. If possible, come to Cambodia again in the future to see the developments, and hopefully, you will not have much sad experiences when you come again.
Thank you Mark for your comment, your input would help us to react in a better way!
Mark I agree with most of your grievances, but I think you lack understanding of many of the underlying causes and lack perspective. Firstly I don’t think you realise how cash poor Cambodia is, it is certainly not richer than Cuba, Cuba is a middle income country with a GDP per capita of over $9k, although Cambodia has seen massive increases in it’s GDP in the last 10 years it’s started from a very low base and is still classed as a developing nation with a GDP per capita of $2470, a quarter of Cuba’s. Comparing is to Iceland which has one of most educated populations on the planet and even after the crash still has a GDP per capita of $40k is just laughable.
Cambodia has only been stable for not much more than a decade, with more than 30 years of war and instability prior to that, there have been few countries that have been decimated on the scale that Cambodia was, which accounts for the siege mentality most Cambodians still posses. The progress Cambodia has made in the 10 years I’ve lived here is truly breathtaking. Phnom Penh has gone from dirt roads, constant blackouts and gun fire being a common sound at night, to skyscrapers, parks and traffic jams in only ten years. Imagine what could happen in the next ten!!
I totally agree with you about NGO’s, many of them are complete shams, but there’s an NGO law currently being passed that will no doubt bring an end to many of them.
Yep tuk-tuk and moto drivers can be annoying, especially in the tourist centers, but it doesn’t take much ingenuity to solve, just find one you like, take his phone number and keep him on a retainer, problem solved. Also having annoying taxi drivers is hardly a unique feature of Cambodia, taxi’s in every country have their quirks, from the fake taxi’s in Ho Chi Minh, the ones who try to drag you to gift shop in Bangkok or Delhi, to the “private hire” cabs in the UK.
The litter is also a big problem, but once again, you need context. Only the population centers have anything that resembles functioning refuge collection. Everyone in the countryside and outer edges of the city have two choices, they can burn their rubbish or fly tip it. Given those two options, can you understand why many probably don’t want to put their rubbish in their pockets and take it home? Decent refuge will come, but you have to understand that for most rural Cambodians it’s pretty low down the order of priorities when you consider a provincial woman still have a one in twenty chance of death during child birth. Until GDP and basic child health indicators have increased, the government is going to continue building, schools, health centers and basic infrastructure over pleasantries like land fill sites and garbage trucks.
The majority view says
MARK, you are a raving twat. Your preaching is dull, judgemental and wrong in the most basic sense. You never really saw Cambodia, sure you were there but you never saw it. I noted on your website that you consider ALL ASIANS to be pigs. I’m not Asian, so my response isn’t because I’m personally offended. Stay away from Cambodia thye don’t need arseholes like you. To be honest nowhere does. Go back to Canada and take your vacations in Iceland. You are clueless, rude, arrogant and witless.
To the Cambodians who replied so gracefully to his arrogant, witless rambling: please don’t judge caucasians by this idiots statements.
Anonymous says
Hello my name is Gus ,
I read your tome and thought it might be helpful to add some observations.
I have worked in cambodia and with NGO,s all the money and time came from my own personal resources and I wouldn’t have it any other way.As an Australian i’m fairly irreverent to any religion but have a high level of respect to the quality of life all should enjoy.So I would give my time and money to help others but if they didn’t listen to the advice or talked over me hindering others from hearing advice I would tell them to shut up or piss off .I was there to build houses for the protection of children I had no time for slackers,but having said that my irreverence let me see past the poverty and see the people for what they are,people.Good ,bad,scammers,helpers,whatever.So I didn’t take things personally “trick me once shame on you,trick me twice shame on me”a good saying and advice for travellers anywhere.In regards to Tuk Tuk drivers I gave as good as I got when I got a good driver I’d use him all day and negotiate a price ( at the end of the day I usally double his fee ).Bad drivers where told they were,this was usally met with a cheeky grin because they knew it too.The bottom line is Cambodians are beatiful people and deserve my help and don’t worry about death threats,in my exprience the only ones to worry about are when they’re standing in front of you with a AK 47 !
Thank you Gus,
I think we are not the only one who pay double price to the good Tuk Tuk drivers.
Miki says
The REAL problem is that most khmer really thinks YOU are in THEIR country like an unwelcome invader, so THEY have ANY rights over YOU.
You are seen as an orange to squeeze as much as they can and nothing more, and you deserve that because you are in THEIR country so you’ll have to put up with everything.
rip off foreigners is the national sport here (I’Ive been living in Phnom Penh for 3 years) and thay have evolved sophisticated methods for spilling your money day by day for any reason, like slowly draining a well know what I mean?
Thevisitor says
Cheaters are everywhere!
Even in countries in Europe we were almost cheated if we didn’t get angry and argue at this Italian who was trying to rip us off. If you’re a foreigner, most places, if not all countries you will go to will have people trying to cheat you.
To mr. Mark, I’m not Cambodian but I don’t like how you mentioned in your reply what a bitchland their country is. It is unfair to harshly criticize a country for all your bad experiences. I’ve had a lot of bad experiences in a lot of countries, and sometimes out of my irritation I say something harsh too. But you shouldn’t compare Iceland with Cambodia. You can’t force what good things your country have on them (even if it IS nice and the proper thing to do such as trash). Iceland and Cambodia are way different even if Iceland had been going through harsh economic times.
Thank you for your comment. I total agree with we cannot judge a country by just simply staying in a very short period.
I think the phrase below will explain something:
“When you look at a person, any person, remember that everyone has a story. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them.”
JR72 says
After reading this and the comments, maybe one of us non-Cambodian types should write an article for Khmerbird suggesting how foreigners (be they workers, organised tour group holiday makers or independent backpacker types) should treat Cambodians.
I’m pretty sure there’s a good amount of give and take here on both sides (Khmer and foreigner), as with anywhere….
Yes, I totally support the idea. I will look into a good way to get contents from the foreigners.
Thank and appreciate all your comments.
MaidaS says
To all Cambodians-
Mark is well-known online for being a total DICK. He’s a horrible, horrible excuse for a human being and lacks any understanding or compassion.
Cambodia is a brilliant place with many brilliant people - of course there are exceptions as in any country.
Don’t listen to anything he says because most foreigners laugh at his stupidity and make fun of him.
🙂
Thank you for your comment. I don’t know the real reason behind Mark’s writing. All his post express the negative feedback from Cambodia.
But as you said, we know Cambodian is a great country!